Friday, March 27, 2015

Nothing new ... just better

I often wonder how the human brain works.
The only thing that could make
me a morning person ...
The beauty of a sunrise.

I often wonder many things.

What is it that drives one person to climb a mountain while another simply wants to photograph it?  Why will one person skydive while another is nervous about even flying?  How can one person love roller coasters but get motion sick in a moving car?  Why is it so difficult for some to receive compliments while others seek approval constantly?  Where does self appreciation end and egotism begin?   What really is Victoria's Secret?

I'm not sure there is any way to answer these ... or at least if I asked a dozen people I would likely get at least 12 different answers.

I tend to not give myself credit for my accomplishments ... I tend to be hypercritical and hyper-analytical of most everything I do.  This will likely never completely change.

I know I am my own worst enemy in so many ways, but I've never really thought about trying to change this ... I'm not sure I know how to change this.

Maybe I'm making this far too complicated.

A nice picture of a healthy snack
If somebody does well on a task or something I appreciate I will tell them, "Good job." or "Thank you."

When I finish a project I say, "All I did was ... " or "I didn't finish that other part ..." or "I could have done better."  And I don't just say this to myself ... I say it to my manager and the other supervisors.

I'm trying to make one simple change at a time.

When I finish something I tell myself, "Good job."  When I report a job status I tell my manager what I HAVE accomplished rather than focusing on what has not been done ... a complete report rather than just the flaws.

I am good at what I do ... I deserve to get a little credit from myself.

I'm not seeking the spotlight ...

I don't exaggerate my capabilities ...

In fact, I still berate myself for the stupid things I do ... for the things I cannot or do not accomplish.

The past few years have taught me that I can change ... that I can adapt ... that I have become comfortable in my own skin.

I want to learn to be comfortable in my own brain.
Small accomplishment
The game 2048 -
I reached the goal
of the game

I look at everything I have learned over the past few years ... what I've learned about myself ... what I've figured out about life in general.  I think of all the things that I have been through ... all the issues I have survived and moved beyond.

I don't need to beat the odds ... I've already done that.  I've learned from many setbacks and moved beyond many obstacles.

Can I do better?  Yes ... of course.

Am I learning to appreciate what I have accomplished?  Yes ... finally.

It's all about moving forward now.