Sometimes it is the little things that perplex me the most.
For my entire life I have watched girls ... ladies take a handful of hair and after a brief moment of dactyl manipulation their hair is magically transformed into a beautiful bun, or possibly held in perfectly symmetrical place by a hair-clip.
This is better than a Chris Angel illusion as far as I'm concerned.
As I try to work with my hair I am convinced that I look like a Parkinson's patient taking a Zumba class. With my occasional Tourette syndrome outbursts I eventually wind up with a strange mass stuck near the back of my head ...
There are other slightly more complex issues that are still beyond my grasp ... Like, how to fit just about everything into a purse ... everything but the one item you need apparently. I don't even know why women need to carry half the stuff they do, just that they have it "just in case."
There are so many times I cause myself to worry and doubt ... from the silly and insignificant like what shade of lipstick, to huge things like will I ever actually look like a lady. And when these fears hit I just stop ... like a deer in the headlights, temporarily paralyzed in the moment of uncertainty and not knowing what to do.
My wife and I haven't talked much about me since last week ... I don't blame her, this is a lot to adjust to. By the same token, knowing she says she will support me helps, but her silence raises my trepidation level. I do know the thought of me taking hormones causes her some concern ... but she has not said no to the idea.
I will wait. I've waited this long, I can be patient for a few weeks or months for her to get used to the idea.